Famished Firdaus' Top 5 after 6

It has been 6 years since I started this blog. It has been a journey filled with explorations of delectable tastes and disgusting WCs. A journey of self-discovery almost, with the realisation that maybe, just maybe, I could pull off a couple of paragraphs of decent writing and get completely sozzled while doing it. My posts can never be construed as reviews and I take no responsibility for anyone misinterpreting my work in this way. I am no expert on food nor a purveyor of critiques on the culinary arts. I can never be entrusted with the responsibility of discussing flavours and tastes simply because I don’t believe that there is any such thing as bad food. Just bad execution and personal tastes. I am a firm believer of the undying truth that taste is personal. As personal as sniffing your own fingers after scratching your own crotch or not minding the smell of your own fart. That personal. And no one can tell you otherwise. Except maybe Emeril Lagasse. Because Emeril Lagasse knows a good fart from the Empire spiced riff-raff you’re normally accustomed to.

That said, I think six years calls for a recap of my top 5 favourite street food experiences in Bangalore. These are ranked in the descending order of their awesomeness and trust me, they deserve an immediate looksee. I’m steering clear of the popular haunts such as Gundu, SG Rao and the Idli-Dosa joints that have been written about enough and more. Doesn’t mean I don’t like them, just means that I had a more fulfilling experience at the places I’m listing. The truly serendipitous discovery, of walking by and stepping in and melting face. Enjoy.

First, a few honourable mentions.

Dilkush Kebab Corner – My favourite kebab joint in the city, now challenged by the Tannery Road discovery, but the old Pereira’s still makes a pretty mean plate of fried chicken fritters that I’d lose a limb for any friggin’ day of the year. If you haven’t bathed in his Marwaan / Devil’s Chutney yet, you’re missing out.

Hilal Restaurant – Hilal remains a deathly famous midnight delight location in Bangalore and while I don’t vouch for 100% of their night menu, they have a serious afternoon biryani and chops meal that needs to be tried as soon as possible. The chicken leg in the biryani is so big, it STICKS OUT OF THE PLATE AND CANNOT BE HIDDEN UNDER THE RICE PILE!

Raman’s Corner -  Chamrajpet Chowmein. Sampige Road Schezwan. Hulimavu Hunan. Bangalorean Chinese. Lots of egg, noodles, rice, assorted bits of veg and green spicy chutney. Stirring up a bowl of badassdom on Malleshwaram 15^th cross for ages now.

On any other day, these would make the list. The fact that they’re not is a testament to what’s to follow. Famished Firdaus’ Top 5 after 6.

5.     Coles Park Standard Kebab – Once located opposite Siddique and New Al Siddique on Miller’s Road, Coles Park Standard Kebaab is the guy who introduced us to Beef Bhuna and Semiyan. Now shifted to the road next to the AKS Convention Center, this place is still the veritable creator of the nalli soup and a pretty delicious Phal too. No place for the squeamish here. There is dirt and bones and flesh and unidentified matter here. Sometimes on the plate too. But it is always extremely delectable.

4.       Vignesh Naidu Biryani Hotel – How many times have you found yourself at the long end of the line outside Veena Stores or CTR waiting, pining, yearning for some breakfast? Did you wake your sorry ass up at 6 AM on a Sunday just so you could beat the crowd and demolish a Benne Masala only to realise that 2000 other people had the same idea? Here’s an alternative for you. Just get out of Veena Stores or CTR and continue down Margosa Road. Take a left towards Malleshwaram Circle and continue under the underpass. Take a right at Link Road and head down 200 meters. This is a breakfast destination for the uninitiated. Order Mutton Pulao and Khaima Ball Curry. Call friend standing in line outside Veena Stores. Loff!

3.       Abdul Lateef Paya Shop – If there is one thing I’ve learned over the past 6 years of writing this blog, it’s that we Bangaloreans love our breakfast. There is a spread of choice here that most cannot even comprehend. It isn’t enough that we have the best dosas in the country and pretty good other south Indian items too, but we also have eccentricities that really make this city the mish-mash of cultures I have grown to love and hate at the same time. It has been a tough task explaining to people that donne biryani and idli and paya soup constitute breakfast for so many people in this city. And the paya soup here is legendary. Located on Slaughterhouse Lane in Shivaji Nagar alongside the abbatoir at Russell Market, Abdul Lateef Paya Shop is that spot that makes what I do worthwhile. I was blown away the first time I made a visit here and at the sheer size of his operations. Open only from 5:30 AM to 9:30 AM, this Paya Soup speciality joint is crowded as fuck. No lines here, oh no, you got to jostle and elbow your way in and stand behind a dude who might still be in the middle of his meal and whisper in his ear to “eat up quickly or I’ll spit in your face”. A truly memorable breakfast, if there ever was on. DO. NOT. MISS. THIS. PLACE.

2.       Tannery Road Secret Joint – The less said, the better. The best veal kebab in town. Among the best Chicken Kebabs in town. A stupendous phal. A whole deep fried Theetar. A pretty good sheek kebab. A great chutney. Quick service. Overcrowded seats. A neglected part of town. These and more, made this experience a story that had to be told. It has to be told again. And again. And again. I’m welling up. Really.

1.       Sri Naidu Military Hotel – After spending years and years roaming the streets of this here great city of ours, it truly is a profound irony that the place that makes it to the top of this list is less than 400 meters from my current place of residence. This then leads to a pertinent observation that I may have touched upon on a couple of earlier posts. Just take a walk. A short walk. Around your neighbourhood. You never know what you may find. What I found, in my opinion, is nothing short of the best military hotel in the city. Open only for lunch, between 12 PM and 2:30 PM, Sri Naidu Military Hotel is discovery that deserves to be in the top of this list. The establishment means business, no mucking about with biryani and chapathis. Just Rice, chops, liver, boti, thalay and chicken / mutton fry. A truly spectacular execution of otherwise popular military items makes Sri Naidu Military Hotel the number one location in my list of gastro experiences.

Now for the Top 5 Bars that deserve a post of their own. Damn, where are “Maums”, “What a guy” and “G” when you need them for inputs.